You may have heard of wake windows, but how do you use them in your daily routine and how can you establish a solid foundation for sleep with natural and lasting sleep associations? We’ll go through all of that below, but first make sure you have read our general overview of the hormones and routines governing the newborn sleep schedule so that here we can dive into some practical tips for your daily routine.

Independent sleepers can both self-initiate sleep and self-soothe. But, no baby is born with these abilities – they must be learned. There are a few things you can do from the start to begin the learning process for self-initiation of sleep and self-soothing. Creating positive sleep associations will help your baby learn to self-initiate sleep (#2). Giving your baby a chance to settle on their own will help them learn to self-soothe (#3). And following a routine will make this all seem possible (#1).

The following three guidelines are things that you can start from day 1 to set the scene for great newborn sleep. Then we can discuss the million dollar question- when will my baby be able to sleep independently?

A wake window is a stretch of time where your baby is awake. From the second they open their eyes, until they close them again, meaning that wake windows include feeding time. Before setting up a real “schedule” for your baby (which is very hard to do in the beginning), you can follow wake windows to guide their day time sleep. Their flexibility allows for easy adjustments, because it’s exactly when you get used to something that it changes.

There are some general rules, as well as changes based on age. Many newborn sleep experts recommend following wake windows until 5 to 6 months of age, then moving to a clock schedule where your baby will take naps at a certain time of day.

Based on age

• From birth to 1 month: wake windows of 30 to 60 minutes
• From 1 to 3 months: 60 to 90 minutes
• From 3 to 4 months: 75 to 120 minutes
• From 4 to 6 months: 1.5 to 2 hours

Sleep associations begin around 3.5 to 4 months. By understanding newborn sleep associations you can create positive ones, such as a sleep mantra and bedtime routines, and minimize negative ones like feeding-to-sleep. We have two recommendations for creating positive sleep associations: Feed-upon-wake and Sleep mantras.

Once you are following your wake windows, you may wonder what to do when your baby is awake! Its all about routine. With this rhythm the first thing you do when your baby wakes up is feed them.

There are two main reasons that we recommend the eat-play-sleep routine. First, you want to disassociate feeding from sleeping, so that your baby can learn to self-initiate sleep and not rely on feeding to put them to sleep. Second, on a more practical note, babies digest when eating so you might as well wait until after they feed so that you don’t have to change their nappy twice, or worse – have to decide whether to let them sleep in a dirty nappy or wake them up to change it.

Yes, we have used the word minimize and not avoid. And yes, we call this tip “Feed Upon Wake” because this does not mean that you must avoid Feed Before Sleep. If you have read about oxytocin then you know that it promotes rest and relaxation. Your baby gets oxytocin from breastmilk and produces their own during physical contact. Additionally, feeding – the actual physical act of suckling – is a known soothing mechanism. So, while it is great to Feed Upon Wake, you can also add in a feeding top-up just before sleep to calm down if needed or to make sure their tank is full!  

Yes, routines are important. And no, they do not have to include a bath, massage and book in order to signal to your baby that it is time to sleep. It can be as simple as a phrase that you repeat. Consistency is what counts, here so make it something you can stick to.

Think of a mantra that feels good for you that communicates two things:

1. It is time to sleep.

2. Your baby can sleep on their own.

It can be as simple as, “It’s time to sleep. I will be back when you need me.” A mantra is important both for baby and for you. By vocalizing what is happening and your confidence in them, you are creating a secure attachment.

This one is often the hardest to implement although it requires mere will-power and reasoning. You must give your baby the chance to self-soothe and to self-initiate sleep. Soft crying with pauses, moving around in bed, and sucking are all ways that your baby can soothe themself. So let them try by giving them the time to practice their skills.

Once your baby is fed, clean and ready for bed, confidently put them down, say their sleep mantra, exit the room and then, wait. If they are crying, try to wait at least five minutes. Set a timer. Make yourself accountable. You will be amazed at what they are capable of if you give them the chance. You can go back in and resettle your newborn, either in your arms or in their bed and then exit again. Wait another 5 minutes, or even 6 if you can.

New skills require time and consistency. And you will see, it is often right when your hand is on the doorknob that their crying ends and your baby has fallen asleep on their own.

Only after the famous “fourth trimester”. At around 4 to 6 months of age your baby develops the ability to regulate their attention. Meaning they can turn their attention away from distraction or stimulation when they are ready to sleep. Before this milestone, you need to control the environment so that it facilitates sleep and wake.

During the fourth trimester a sleep environment should be like the womb: dark, tight, noisy and in motion. Cue the 4S soothing technique – all the ways that you can recreate the womb: swaddling, holding at the side/stomach position, shushing-white noise, and swinging. Research has shown that from birth to 12 weeks, the 4S soothing technique decreases daily crying, the number of daily feeds, and the number of nighttime wakes.